Battle Royale

I guess this is only really underrated if you don't live in Korea/Japan/China, but I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess the majority of the people visiting Rated Wrong! are domestic.

So for those of you in the States who are unaware, Battle Royale is a totally kick-ass movie out of Japan about a bunch erm "8th graders" who are kidnapped and forced to kill each other on a jungle island.

I know what you're already saying, "When and where can I see this?"  But just in case you need further convincing...

This movie is a lot of fun.  Who cares if the plot is paper thin ("Adults lost confidence in their youth", what?)  Based on a Japanese novel, this has inspired more fan fiction than avatar and some pretty effed-up manga comics (I've seen pictures).  For what is comparatively a low budget action film it is shot pretty well.  The soundtrack is almost completely Mozart(!?)  Its funny and has a good balance between camp, action, and has some sincere moments but doesn't take itself too seriously.

Oh, this part is a riot.

Now the word on this movie for years is that hollywood has been trying to get the rights for it, something I hope never happens (at least not unless I get to write the script).  So at least until Paul W.S. Anderson ruins it, Battle Royale, I'll call you Underrated.

Oh so completely ridiculous.

Ask A Hater: (Least) Favorite Musician

Dear Hater,

Who is your most hated musician out today?

- Coolio

Coolio,

Holy Shit! Let me first just say on behalf of everyone here at Rated Wrong how exciting it is to have a former celebrity writing us.  I never cared too much for any of your work but I loved "Amish Paradise" and have been known to rock out to Bad Hair Day to this very day.

Now to answer your question.  I know you might be inclined to think I'd hate on something obvious, like the Jonas Brothers or Katy Perry (who I would never hate!).

FACT: Katy Perry is very hot, making her very difficult to hate.

No, my most hated musician is none other than Delicious D.

Who is Delicious D you ask?  Well, I don't really know.  I've never listened to his music.  I've never read anything about him.  I don't even know if he's alive.  I clicked on his Myspace page once but exited out before it loaded.

All I know is that, for some ungodly reason, my Itunes decided that everything by the band Tenacious D is actually by this guy and so anytime I play a Tenacious D song this comes up on the album artwork...

What is more awesome than a white dude in a blue fluffy hat standing in front of a giant mound of cash in front of a massive explosion?

What the hell is that?  Certainly not Jack Black.  The image is so chock full of cliches (my favorite is the presence of the booty dancers with a little too much booty in the corner) that I question whether or not Delicious is meant to be taken seriously.

Either way, I flippin' hate this guy and am insulted that Apple products seem to think I'd ever listen to his music.

-The Hater

P.S. Just kidding Coolio, love "Gangsta's Paradise".

Red Dawn

There are just some things I will never understand.  Well, actually, I guess I do understand how people in the 80s thought Red Dawn was a cool movie.

It had Swayze, Howell, and Charlie Sheen back before Swayze was a ghost (for the first time), Sheen had a hooker problem, and Howell had no career.

It also stuck it to the Russians good and hard, a popular sentiment during the Reagan years.  But in today's world of Call of Duty and Band of Brothers a movie like this one would get laughed out of Hollywood.

Red Dawn might be the most unrealistic modern war movie ever.  The Russian soldiers make Vader's storm troopers look like Delta Force.  Seriously, the A-team fought more competent enemies.  Are you telling me they can't find a bunch of high school kids with absolutely no military training?  How the hell did they even get organized enough to invade in the first place?

The "heroes" are a bunch undisciplined, whiney, obnoxious, doofuses.  They just sort of hang out in the woods, with no light or noise discipline, and whenever they feel like it they go blow up a Russian base which all seem to be a comfortable walking distance away.

Don't the Russians have helicopters? Countless supplies at their disposal?  Trained soldiers?  Are the Russians even looking for them?  Oh actually, yes they are because they come up with that totally ridiculous plan of forcing the one guy to eat the tracking device so they can ambush them.  Why didn't that kid tell anyone that he had a tracking device in him anyway?

Is that John Candy on the end?

The only good thing I can say about this movie is that "Wolverines!" was a pretty clever name for that level in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2.

Some people apparently love this movie because they think it is "patriotic" or whatever.  I say to those people, remember that scene where the Russians are executing the prisoners and instead of dying with some dignity the prisoners decide to scream a horrendous rendition of "Oh Beautiful for Spacious Skies"?  And they wonder why the communists hate us.

Red Dawn, you ain't Swayze, you're overrated.